Thursday, February 26, 2009

Twenty-Four Hours Of Plastic Pumpkins

Can I make up for a near two-month long blog void by posting a month's worth (i.e., as in & to wit: 28 posts not counting this one) of posts in one twenty-four hour period. Probably not because I have many different and fun things to do tomorrow (I have nothing to do tomorrow) but it will be a noble experiment however it ends.

Twenty-eight new posts will hopefully appear below this one at various points during the next twenty-four hours. They will be numbered. They will not appear in any particular order. They will not all of them be very interesting, but they will be... and being is half the battle.

EDIT: Okay, so I just realized that today (Friday) is not the last day of the month... tomorrow is the last day of the month. I thought it was today. Stupid February and its weird-ass number of days and its awkward 'r.' So pretend like this post is new and that the 24 hours are starting riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight........... now!

ANOTHER EDIT: Okay, so I got 18 posts done. Not bad. I'm okay with that. 18 is a good number.

16. Activity Time!

Don't let the unnecessarily complicated directions deter you... once you've gotten a handle on the whole "toward you, away from you" thing then these paper robots and space thingies are easy to make.

I expect dioramas, people!

1. Vintage Riddleburger

That's me there holding the monkey head. It's my proudest moment! Really.

22. Collect Them All

Next to the trading cards that used to be in every loaf of Wonder Bread, these tv show cards from the back panels of Hostess snack cakes were the coolest things on the bread aisle. I blame them for my sudden pre-adolescent weight gain.

27. Do Not Collect 200 Darsek

Oh, man... I can still remember the day when I walked into the Verona McDonald's and found the place covered from tile to linoleum with plastic & paper bits of Star Trek tat. I didn't have any idea at the time what a 'Star Trek' even was, but I did know that my Happy Meals would never be the same. This was my very first encounter with the whole 'tie-in promotion' experience... a phenomenon (Do do-do do) that I fully support to this very day, as my glove box full of Burger King Pink Panther toys can attest to!

And a very special shout out to the Internet for making it so damn easy to find out what the Klingon unit of currency is!

7. Priorities

Held captive by hostile natives, tied upside down to a pole and about to be sacrificed to a vengeful island god... no reason not to check out a nice rack when one presents itself.

9. Gummy Jaws

6. Drawing Time!

Make a face on that banana. Do it! Use a Sharpie.

11. Found Art

If anyone out there knows Jemia, please let me know if she still plays the flute. I like to think that she still plays the flute.

19. Be Mine

A few Valentine's since I missed the day-

A Toucan Sam Valentine? Ida you're my hero!

10. The Dashboard Diva Does Broadway

The Dashboard Diva fails to live up to her hype... I expected a lot more hip motion.

Two days after this video was filmed the Dashboard Diva had some sort of "Behind the Scenes" meltdown and crumbled to pieces on my passenger's side floorboard. There is still a tiny plastic arm floating around the floor of my car somewhere.

It was the best $1.00 I ever spent.

2. Close Encounters

17. Monkey Coaster!

My new favorite Very Important Thing That I Must Be Doing On The Internet!

Follow this link and then another and start coasting. Note: real world physics do apply! More or less.

20. Fluffy Things That Want You Dead

3. Veggie Tales

26. Time & The Rani

The nice thing about posting a month's worth of random things in one day's time? I can put up pictures of stuff that really don't have any kind of a point to them. Like this picture of incense.

1. The Bagboy Wonder

Feast your eyes on this! It's what every boy dreams of getting when he plunks his quarter into the gumball machine and spins that shiny silver knob. It's a small plastic bag with a picture of Robin, the Boy Wonder on it! Proud, proud Robin with his tiny, tiny panties and his little elf shoes and his disturbingly shapely, hairless legs.

Since the day that the vending machine gods saw fit to plunk this into the palm of my little hand I've tried to think about what I might keep in this plastic Robin bag, but nothing seems worthy enough. I think that when I die, I shall have myself cremated and ask that my ashes be stored for all eternity in this wonderful plastic bag!

24. Unexpected Zombie Attack!!!

Don't worry! He just wants a tasty cruller!

14. Luv

This is what I was going to post on Valentine's Day... I had it scanned and ready to go, but I couldn't even find a couple minutes during the day to upload it. I need to budget my time more wisely.

Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day!