Thursday, March 29, 2007

Cartoon Character Card Games #2: Yogi Bear Rummy

The Yogi Bear Rummy Game played just like regular gin, more or less. Instead of regular suites, each character's card came in "Hats," "Sacks," "Ties," and "Hams" suites. At some point in this particular pack of cards' history someone appears to have eaten half of the Boo Boo "Ham" card... that's why you should always have bowls of snacks within easy reach on game night.

Speaking of Cindy Bear... has everyone seen that "Bedrock Idol" Pebbles Cereal ad? Tell me when Betty Rubble has ever looked hotter...

Purple Snagglepuss is just wrong.

I've never played gin with jokers before so I don't know what this is doing here.

Sunday, March 25, 2007


"Hello and welcome on this Sunday evening of March 25, Two Thousand and Seven. My name is Freaky-Ass-Naked-Fleshy-Feathery-Nipple-Eyed-Conjoined-Chicken-Man-Thing-Creature-Beast-In-Pixie-Boots. You may call me ... if ever the occasion should arise where you would call me at all... Freaky-Ass-Naked-Fleshy-Feathery-Nipple-Eyed-Conjoined-Chicken-Man-Thing-Creature-Beast-In-Pixie-Boots."

"Above me is my host body, Jeremy. Jeremy will not speak to you and you are not to speak to Jeremy. Should Jeremy feel the need to communicate with you then he will do so through me. Jeremy will never feel the need to communicate with you!"

"What must have been several years ago by this time the dull-witted owner of this blog, and the man in who's palatial estate Jeremy and I are forced to reside, was challenged ...some say 'tagged'... by the ethereally beautiful Ms. eviedee to create a post wherein he would reveal to the world 6 strange things about himself... as if the world needed to know more about him than it already does...."

"As I knew it would from the start, it seems that if this task - I TOLD YOU NOT TO SPEAK TO JEREMY! -it seems that if this task is ever to be completed it is I who must do the completing. As per his usual routine Mr. Altis' days have been far too full of boozin', whorin', tokin', cow tippin', ding-dong-ditchin', and other activities which end in a lack of a 'g' to bother fulfilling the duty handed down to him by the enchantingly lovely Ms. evie. I wish I could say that this surprised me, but alas... Is it not I who keeps this household running? Is it not I who pay the bills? Is it not I who mow the lawn and water the houseplants? Is it not I who feeds the cat? Is it not I who-"

"What do you mean we don't have a cat, Jeremy?"

"Well, then who's cat have I been feeding all these many weeks?"

"Not a cat? Then what-"

"An 'O-Possum?' What the deuce is an 'O-Possum?' Never mind! This 'O-Possum' and I shall have words when next he comes begging at our back door!"

"Continuing my narrative... after many exhaustive hours I have narrowed down Mr. Altis' myriad in-bred personality quirks to a short list of gentle foibles which I think will cause the least amount of soul-numbing horror amongst you, our readers. Believe me, were you to bear witness to the full scope of this man's strangeness you would well understand why I am a bed wetter."

"There were some rules that went along with this tagging thing, but I've forgotten what they are. Anyway, I do not obey the rules... I make the rules!"

"Strange Thing #1: He saved all the 'Weekly Readers' he ever received in school... including 'Summer Weekly Readers.' I mean, who does that? What kind of a loser even subscribed to 'Summer Weekly Reader' in the first place?"

"Strange Thing #2: His entire DVD collection consists of nothing but movie musicals and slasher flicks. I shudder to think what an FBI profiler would make of this."

"Wait just a moment! Is that the complete first season of 'Knot's Landing' that I spy? Dear Mother of God! No, Jeremy! Restrain yourself! It would be impolite to guffaw!"

"......... I had forgotten what a lovely couple Gary and Val were."

"Strange Thing #3: Before he goes to sleep, Mr. Altis must check inside every closet in the room to ensure that no one lurks within. If he checks the closet and then has to leave the room for some reason he must re-check the closet upon his return in case someone snuck in while he was peeing. He doesn't really think that anybody is hiding in there, but he just knows that the first time he forgets to check..."

"I don't know what he's worried about. There's never anything in there but t-shirts and porn."


"All this talk of people other than myself has parched my beak. To the juice boxes, Jeremy!"


"Strange Thing #4: My absurd 'owner' has a paralyzing fear of all things in this world designed to remove blood from his body. This includes ticks, leeches and needles but not vampires. He admits that there are no such things as vampires and sees little point in fearing them. However..."

"Strange Thing #5: ... he believes in werewolves. He is of the opinion that a world big enough to contain platypuses and triffids is big enough to contain half-man, half-wolf creatures. I hate to say it, but I agree with him completely on this point. Knowing how lowly and unclean you humans are it would not surprise me to learn that someone, somewhere, at some point in the past shacked up with a wolf and spawned a godless little pack of halflings who's progeny still roam the forgotten wilds of this sorry planet."

"Yes, Jeremy. Triffids are real."

"Strange Thing #6: Strange thing #6 is that I grow almost as weary of this exercise as I have of your company! Which is not that strange of a thing at all! If you want for a sixth number to this list than merely peruse some of the previous postings this man has made to this very blog! He names pumpkins for God's sake! Strangeness for the picking! I hope that you'll have fun, as for me... "Rosemary and Thyme" is just about to begin. To the TV room, Jeremy!"

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Trout! Rabbit! Trout!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Sunday, March 18, 2007

An Inconvenient Elf

Al Gore may have gotten all the press, but some thirty years ago Big Boy was already well aware of the dangers posed by pumping the atmosphere full of toxic chemicals...

But wait, there's more!

But wait a bit longer, there's even morer!

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Plaisteach Puimpcín go Brách


Friday, March 16, 2007

The Call Of The Playground

I thought I'd do my part in aiding the playground picture-taking call to arms sounded over at Neato Coolville Unfortunately, it's way too late in the game to capture most of the good stuff. The playgrounds I remember from my childhood are still there, but hardly anything remains of the cool play-structures I used to crack my skull open on. Everything nowadays is low, wide plastic slides, rubber tire swings, and miniature rock-climbing walls... and the few bits and pieces that I remember have seen much better days...

The coolest thing around (and, at the same time, the most derelict) is a sad little UFO that sits in the Ruritan Community Park in my ancestral homeland of Mount Sidney, VA.

This park is relatively new, newer than the UFO itself, so this climbing toy must have been imported from somewhere else. It must also be the sentimental favorite of somebody in the upper levels of the Ruritan park-managing hierarchy 'cause it's the only remaining bit of rusted metal in a playground full of modern cedar climbing structures.

I admire this little fella's tenacity.

Purcell Park in Harrisonburg, Va was one of my favorite stomping grounds as a kid for three main reasons. First off, this park was the home of a real honest to goodness fighter jet! It set right at the entrance to the park and had one ladder at the front that took you up into the cockpit and one in the back that took you into the fuselage. So cool climbing around in that thing and shooting down enemy aircraft! Second cool thing about the place was a giant enclosed spiral slide that had to have been fifty feet tall if it was an inch! First two or three times I ever tried to go down that slide I froze at the top of the ladder and had to be carried down to the ground by accompanying adults. Awesome! Third cool thing about this park was some kind of crazy spinning merry-go-round slash seesaw thingie that spun in and out and around like an amusement park Scrambler, only mom-powered. And there was always somebody's mom present who was willing to spin you 'til bits of foam formed in the corners of your mouth! When it was time to go home you had to pry me off of that spinny thing kicking and screaming (and foaming.)

None of that stuff is there anymore. Purcell Park is a shadow of its former self. Purcell Park may not even be the park's name anymore. All the street signs pointing the way there disappeared a couple years ago and the only signs in the park itself refer to the place as "Park."

These seesaw horses were there when I was a kid, although I don't remember ever riding on them... far to tame compared to fighter jets and crazy spinny things!

The bouncy animals are an old school feature of the park as well. They were always good for at least one quick go round if for nothing else than to see if you could get them bouncing hard enough to hit the ground. Spine-jarring good fun!

And that's it for cool old local playground color. Kind of a sad showing, all told. There are still a few possible park locations outside of my regular roaming area that I'm planning to check out when time allows...

By the way, the UFO pictures were taken yesterday when it was in the 70's and I was relaxing in shorts and a tee. The Purcell Park pics were taken today when I was bundled up in my warmest winter coat, all hunched over to keep the chunks of ice that were falling from the sky from going down the back of my shirt... oh what a difference a day makes!