In Memoriam Meleagris Gallopa

As Black Friday brings with it the official end of Turkey Week, I think that it's only fitting that we should all stop for a moment to honor those brave fowls who gave their lives so that we could give thanks for our blessings and o.d. on tryptophan all in one huge orgy of football, parade floats and food. Ladies and gentlemen, a minute of silence for the turkey...

One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi, four Mississippi, five Mississippi, six Mississippi, seven Mississippi, eight Mississippi... Mississippi looks really weird when you write it out a whole bunch of times in a row like that... seven Mississippi, eight Mississippi, wait... eight, nine? Ten Mississippi? I've lost count...

Damn.

Whatever. It's the thought that counts.

Speaking of thoughts and the counting there of- if anybody is interested in how my quest for cool Thanksgiving swag went this week, it didn't. There is no cool Thanksgiving swag out there. The closest I got was in one of the local Goodwill stores where I found a plastic kitchen plaque with a bible verse on it that was illustrated with a picture of an overflowing cornucopia. It was 50 cents. I couldn't bring myself to buy it.

There's always next year...

P.S. I Googled the Latin name of the wild turkey. I do not know the Latin name of things just off the top of my head. Please do not think that I am that person.