Friday, April 20, 2007

Tales Of Fantastic Horrors! Part Two: Plastic Pythons!

Previously on "Tales Of Fantastic Horrors!"-

What manner of terrifyingly tricked-out torture chamber will Johnny find behind Door of Doom #1?

Why... it's a lovely den!

In case I forgot to mention it before, old Doc Weird is a shape changer.

Johnny's "It's Nappin' Time!" catchphrase never took off the way Stan hoped it would...

Wait a minute. He's not going to-

Yep. The Human Torch is trying to fight off a fire-breathing dragon by throwing books at it. All the while, I'm assuming, shrieking like a six year old girl.

Holy hopping horny toads! I've had nightmares like this!

While not as effective as Johnny's book throwing plan, Reed's 'hiding on the chandelier' idea is a viable tactic in any non library-based reptile attack situations.

That's a lot of snakes, for sure... still it shouldn't take the leader of the premiere super-team of the Marvel Universe very long to take care of a few pissy serpents.



I'm gonna go microwave some popcorn, yell at me if anything happens.

I think now's a good time for a little text quoting (care of the author, Mr. William Johnston)-

"For, in fighting the pythons, he had tied himself in so many knots and wound himself in and out and around and about himself so many different ways that he had become as tangled as a bowl of spaghetti. It would be hours, it seemed, before he could determine where he began and where he ended."

Oh, Reed... you stupid, stupid man you. Looks like Susan's uselessness cooties are starting to rub off on you.

Speaking of our favorite poorly realized token female... I can't wait to see what surprises the House of Horrors has in store for her in our next installment of "Tales of Fantastic Horrors!"

No comments: